Playlist
by Princess Rayen
Summary: Updated with Chapter 10: Sand Castle. The death that ushers to us all came for you so soon. Too soon.
1. Unfaithful

I feel like I should feel terrible after writing this but I couldn't sleep until I finished. Just happened to be listening to Unfaithful by Rihanna and decided, hey let's write a short something or another about a song. I think my next one will be titled Drowning, derived from the song of the same title by The Backstreet Boys. Please enjoy~

* * *

Lips met lips in a hard kiss, full of desire and urgency, but the passion underneath was more than enough for the two. They broke apart but not for long as they clung to one another in desperation, as if it would be their last time. It may just have been their last time in each other's arms.

"Grimmjow.."

Their backs hit the sofa, too lost in one another to make it to the bedroom. Their hands roamed, groping and pinching and rubbing, delving further into their arousal.

"Grimm, we can't - ah," Ichigo's attempt at explaining cut short with the biting and sucking at his neck.

"You can't come to me and say that. You can't come to my house so late at night and expect that I'll just let this go." Grimmjow growled.

A part of Ichigo wanted to just let go and allow Grimmjow what he wanted but the pain over his body wouldn't allow him to forget why he was there in the first place. Grimmjow's hold on him tightened and he gasped aloud in pain.

Everything inside their bubble of hazy lust seemed to freeze at the sound and Ichigo took a deep breath to calm his racing heart. Despite this, he could hear it in his own ears as well as he could feel it and he wondered if Grimmjow could hear it and feel it too.

Grimmjow's eyes although darker with the dilation, clouded with anger and annoyance. "He's still abusing you." The statement was so blunt, so loud in the quiet room, Ichigo felt as if he had been stabbed.

"No! Renji's just, he's just-" Ichigo stood.

"He's abusing you! He kicks you where no one can see, he leaves handprints and finger marks around your throat, he fucking beats you up and rapes you when you don't want it and you say nothing! You won't even fight back!" Grimmjow stood too.

"Y - you don't-"

"Don't you dare tell me I don't know, I do know and you know how I know?" Grimmjow ripped the button up, dark and discoloring bruises covered his chest disappearing lower behind a bloodied bandage wrapped messily around the orangette's abdomen. "I've seen it. All of it. I've explored parts of your body you haven't, and yet you try to lie about what he's doing to you."

The blunet reached for the bandages and Ichigo shied away. Grimmjow couldn't see it. The damage had been done.

Quickly, he gathered his coat and ran from Grimmjow, ran from the only person he would truly love, ran because there would be no way to erase the scars, there would be no way.

Grimmjow ran a hand through his hair and sighed. He would try to talk some sense into his lover, he would try and try until he couldn't anymore.

He laid on the sofa and closed his eyes.

Ring ring ring. Ring ring ring.

Grimmjow rubbed his eyes, glaring at the sun filtering through the window. He sat up and stretched, his bones cracking in retaliation for him not sleeping properly in his bed.

Ring ring ring. Ring ring ring.

He looked at the clock realizing it was only 8:53 in the morning. He grabbed the phone and answered it with a huff.

"Do you not realize I could still be sleeping?" He greeted roughly.

"Grimmjow-san!" He knew the voice. It was Ichigo's kid sister Yuzu or something like that. "It's Ichi-nii!"

His tired brain immediately went alert and into overdrive. "What happened?"

Her tear filled voice finally registered in his mind and his panic only rose. "He's dead! They found him dead in his apartment!" She burst into tears and he dropped the phone. He stared and stared and realized it couldn't be true. He had just seen Ichigo, the were just in a fierce lip lock, it had only been a few hours! He wasn't dead.

Grimmjow grabbed his keys and stormed out of his house, there was no way.

But the disappointment and slowing sinking anguish set right in with the sight of Ichigo. His body laid pale and unmoving, terrible blood and bruises covered his face as if he had been punched over and over in his face, deep slice wounds on his torso and legs and the words slut and mine and whore carved over and over onto the beautiful skin. But the most tragic thing was the horrible castration, the complete and rough removal of shaft and balls, the knife still embedded where the testicles would have been. Grimmjow swallowed roughly and held Ichigo's body close, rubbing his arms over and over.

"Come on Ichi-berry, you said you could do this. You said we would be together. Come on, get warm and come home with me, we can live together, we'll move to wherever you want. We'll go to the countryside and I'll get you the white horse you wanted to ride everyday. We can do everything you just have to wake up, open your eyes Ichi-berry, let me see them please." Grimmjow rocked back and forth, holding Ichigo's battered body to his own.

Karin and Yuzu, who came to identify the body, watched with such sadness. To see the hothead Grimmjow act so pitiful, be so scarred, it wasn't a nice sight. Yuzu hadn't stopped and Karin held her tears by the skin of her teeth. She made a vow she wouldn't cry. She wouldn't go back on that, she couldn't.

The funeral service was held two days after and for Grimmjow it still hadn't sunk in. He went on a bloodthirsty rampage for Abarai Renji's head after they managed to pry him from Ichigo's body but he would be able to get him, not anymore. He hoped the red head died and rotted in prison like the demon he was.

Grimmjow stood at the coffin, his hand on the black polished wood as his lover laid inside and he clenched his fist. He would never get to see all those things Ichigo wanted to show him and he would never know what happened, or what Ichigo really wanted to tell him that night.

A tap on his shoulder had him facing Yuzu again, her eyes red rimmed and her face flushed. "They found this in his apartment, I figured you wanted to have it."

He held the envelope tenderly and choked at the sight of his name on it smudged by what looked like tears. He opened it, the letter inside smudged by tears and hastily written.

He read it over and over. He read it until he memorized it and he read it to Ichigo everyday on their anniversary. He read it until his voice gave way and he reached his hand to grab hold of the one he had missed so dearly.

Grimmjow,

If you found this, it means I didn't make it. It's sad huh? But even though it's sad, you have to move on, things can't stop for you because of me and if you let them stop because of me, I will never forgive you. I know we agreed we wouldn't say it but I can't help it. Grimmjow Jeagerjaquez, I love you beyond words, and to love and to hold, in sickness and in health, for rich or for poor, for better or for worse, I'll keep my arms around you until I can have your arms back around me. It's sappy but it's true. Life will go on so until then, I'll be waiting.

Ichi-berry


	2. Drowning

This chapter is titled Drowning derived from a song of the same title by The Backstreet Boys. This chapter gave me more problems than the last one but I think I'm satisfied with the outcome.

I always enjoy a challenge and I don't mind trying other songs from off my playlist. Give me the song, the artist, and the pairing and I'll go there. It'll be fun! Help me out!

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"Jeagerjaquez-sama, please wait. You cannot be on your own, it is dangerous."

"We are on my family's private island, miles from the main land, surrounded by ocean, there is nothing to hurt me here unless sharks will begin walking on land." Grimmjow responded moving closer to the water.

"Jeagerjaquez-sama!"

"Hush Szayel, I'm going for a swim, I don't want to be disturbed."

"As you wish," Szayel bowed respectfully.

Grimmjow removed his shirt and stepped to the waves, his body gradually disappearing under the blue waters. He swam further out until his toes no longer touched the sandy floor and floated on his back. The sun felt warm on the front of his body, the refreshing water on his back and suddenly it wasn't.

He was dragged under the water, taking in water with the unexpected pulling. He struggled and swam back to the surface only to cough, inhale before being pulled back under. They dragged him down, down and he lost air with the struggle.

The bright surface of the water seemed so far and although he wasn't being dragged anymore, his limbs wouldn't move.

Is this how it's going to end?, He thought carefully and was positive he saw a flash of bright color before everything went dark.

XXOO

He heard giggles and laughter coming from above him.

"Can you hear me, stranger?"

Grimmjow opened his eyes and regret it immediately as a headache assaulted his brain. "Where am I?" He asked, his entire body feeling strange.

A hand was on his chest, rubbing soothingly and Grimmjow jumped. He looked over and was met by a a pair of honey brown eyes, curiously watching his movements.

The hand continued to rub and Grimmjow took in the lack of shirt of this strange orange haired boy. All the way down to the brightly colored tail, of the...boy?

Grimmjow was up quickly, gripping his chest and staring at the mermaid who also rose.

"Calm down human, you might drown if you move too much."

"Where am I?" Grimmjow asked again and suddenly realized his nakedness. "And where are my clothes?"

"You're in the castle in the underwater town of Karakura. And your clothes are over there." The other said impatiently. "Now stop moving before you die."

"You're a mermaid." Grimmjow said suddenly. "This has got to be a joke."

"I'm a merman. Merman! I don't have boobs or long hair." The merman said crossing his arms indignantly.

"Take me back to the surface." Grimmjow responded. "Take me back now."

"Inconsiderate aren't you?" The merman said, "I saved your life, even though it was my fault you were almost dead anyway, I still saved your life and this is how you repay me?"

"I don't care, give me my clothes and take me back."

The merman huffed, "I would love to but you see I can't right now and if I let you go on your own you'd either get eaten or you'd die before you even get close to the surface."

"I'll take that chance."

XXOO

"I told you."

"Yeah, yeah." Grimmjow rolled his eyes. "I didn't make it."

They sat in uncomfortable silence for only a few moments before Grimmjow broke the silence. "Why did you bring me here anyway?"

"I was playing around and the way you were floating on the surface, I thought you were dead so I had my pets play around with you but you would have died if I didn't make them stop. You had already lost consciousness but I couldn't take you to the shore so I brought you here."

"You almost killed me in water and took me deeper in water to save me? How the hell am I breathing anyway? And you still haven't told me your name, that's rude."

The merman laughed lightly, "you ask a lot of questions human."

"My name's Grimmjow, mermaid, Grimmjow Jeagerjaquez. So you better answer my questions."

"I'm a merman! My name is Ichigo, Kurosaki Ichigo. And anyway, there's this stuff in the water called reiatsu that we can manipulate for what we want. Right now, I'm manipulating it to act as oxygen for you so you can breathe. Unfortunately, you're still circulating water so when you get to the surface, you'll be coughing water for a bit. The reiatsu only goes so far out of Karakura so that's why you can't make it to the surface on your own without help unless you want to drown."

"Why can't you take me up now?"

"Humans are forbidden unless they're food. That's why I was playing with you. If someone finds out you're here and alive, they'll kill you. I can get you out in a week, only in a week. My father is coming back today, I can't risk him seeing you."

"Well I can't stay confined here for a week. I refuse."

"You have no choice, unless you're okay with being dinner."

"Don't you have like some extra magic stuff in a bottle I can have? I'll reach the surface on my own."

Ichigo thought long and hard until an idea popped in his head. "Wait here," he said, "I have an idea."

He swam away and Grimmjow leaned back on the merman's bed in annoyance. He was a prince, he shouldn't have to be dealing with weird bullshit like this.

Ichigo came back with a bottle of bluish liquid and opened the cork. The blue liquid floated among the water, before surrounding Grimmjow.

"What? What's going on?" Grimmjow was enveloped by the blue and Ichigo grinned maliciously at the bright blue colored tail that replaced his legs.

"What the hell?! What did you do to me?" Grimmjow snarled.

"Oh quit. It should wear off in a week, and when it does I'll take you back. That way you can do as you please and not worry about getting eaten and you don't have to stay here the whole time." Ichigo smiled brightly, "come on, I'll show you around."

"Oi! Wait! I don't know how to work this thing! Wait! WAIT!"

"I think you've gotten the hang of it pretty well. Your bumps and bruises from the walls will heal pretty quickly and don't worry, everybody believed the cover story."

Grimmjow grumbled angrily as he swam next to the orange haired merman. Apparently Ichigo found him wandering listlessly with nothing but his name and horrible attitude and brought him back to take care of him until his memory returned.

"How long am I stuck here again?" Grimmjow muttered.

"I told you, only for a week, unless you fall in love with me or something, then you could stay here forever."

"Why you?" Grimmjow questioned.

"Cause, I'm not gonna let you fall for someone else. That's rude." Ichigo replied with a happy grin. Grimmjow could sense something deeper behind the tone but he let it slide.

"Where are we going anyway?"

"My father has returned, he has summoned me to see him." Ichigo responded with a scowl.

They came upon a room and entered it when a loud voice boomed. "My precious son!"

Ichigo pushed Grimmjow out of the way and smacked his father with his tail fin. "My precious son..." The large merman sighed happily as he floated away.

"What the hell, goat face? You just got back. You never change do you?" Ichigo scowled at his father.

"Ichigo, I heard you have a companion with you, who is it?"

"He's here." Ichigo said, ushering to Grimmjow. "His name is Grimmjow Jeagerjaquez. Found him wandering around when I went out to play with Shinji and Hiyori earlier. He doesn't know anything about himself."

"Nice to meet you! My name is Kurosaki Isshin, I rule over this half of the world's oceans." The merman said, shaking Grimmjow's hand firmly.

"Nice to meet you." Grimmjow nodded, worried the man would crush his hand, or rip his arm off.

"Anyway, we're going now. Gonna show Grimmjow the waters around, see if he remembers anything."

"Have fun my darling son! Be back for dinner!"

"Yeah yeah." Ichigo swam away and Grimmjow followed until they were out of the castle and into the open water.

"Come on, I'll take you through the town."

It was a beautiful sight. The village looked like a tropical reef, bright and beautiful but with houses like humans. Corals and anemones glowed with ethereal beauty and the buzz of merpeople, different colored tails mixing made it surreal. Grimmjow was astonished. "Come on, I'll show you around. Maybe you'll meet someone you know."

Grimmjow snorted. "Highly doubtful."

They swam through the houses and shops, people greeting Ichigo with bows and "Your Majesty" and "Kurosaki-sama" in which Ichigo returned with a wave and a smile.

Grimmjow watched him closely and shook his head. He couldn't get the merman's comment out of his head. Who would fall for a hot headed weirdo like him anyway?

They had explored most of the town when Ichigo told him they had to head back for dinner. As they began back Grimmjow heard a voice he hadn't heard in years.

"Grimmy?" He froze and turned to the woman who called his name. "Is that really you Grimmy? What are you doing here?"

"Nel? Nelliel? What the hell?"

The woman came to him and hugged him tightly, her tail fin seeming to sparkle brighter. "It's been so long!" She said happily. "It's been years!"

"Why are you here? We all thought you were dead." Grimmjow said hugging her awkwardly.

"I don't remember much about the day it happened but I woke up here and decided to stay here with the person who brought me here. When did you get here?" She asked, holding his face in her hands.

"Today actually. This one tried to kill me." Grimmjow said, pointing to Ichigo.

"Well if it isn't Istygo." Nel smirked and Ichigo looked away in annoyance.

"I told you to stop calling me that." Ichigo grumbled. "How do you two know each other anyway?"

"He's my little brother." Nel said, "and you tried to kill him? How horrible of you."

"It was an accident. And besides, I can't take him back to the surface yet."

"Why?"

"You know how it is."

Nel huffed and turned back to Grimmjow. "Well Grimmy, I have to go back now. Come back and see me before you go back to the surface."

Grimmjow nodded dumbly and followed Ichigo back to the castle.

The orange haired merman glanced back at Grimmjow and thanked all the heavens that Nel didn't tell him the truth.

XXOO

"You still haven't fallen for me yet." Ichigo smiled.

"Yeah? It's probably not going to happen fish boy. I don't fall for people I just met. Give me more than a week." Grimmjow snorted. They only had two days left together and Ichigo was dreading every moment.

"I don't want to take you back." Ichigo said.

Grimmjow looked at him. "What?"

Ichigo looked like a fish out of water but continued anyway. "Stay here with me. Forever."

"Are you crazy? You said you would take me back and now you won't? What the hell?"

"Grimmjow," Ichigo started but Grimmjow interrupted.

"Forget it." He swam from the room leaving Ichigo to wonder what he had just done.

Grimmjow went to the throne room where he knew the king would be.

"How can I help you, my boy?" Isshin greeted, worried at the angered look on the blunet's face.

"Send me to the surface. I was human before Ichigo turned me this way. Send me back and take this away from me."

"What?"

Grimmjow remained indifferent to the merman's loud voice and repeated himself. "Send me back."

"You will retain no memories of what happened here. And you can never return."

"I don't care."

Isshin sighed and flicked his hand. "Thank you for bringing life back to my precious son's eyes."

Grimmjow felt a tug and everything went black.

XXOO

It had been only a few days since the he returned to the surface. Szayel and a search crew found him on the beach and took him back to the castle for medical assistance. He remembered everything that went on under the sea and a part of him regretted every action he took but there was nothing he could do now. His dreams were most annoying, flashes of orange and laughter, and that sad face he last remembered seeing.

A knock came to his door. "Jeagerjaquez-sama, it's almost time for the ball. Are you ready?"

"I'm ready." Grimmjow responded as he opened the door.

He followed Szayel down to the ballroom and began doing his job as a prince. He greeted people, declined dances, and spoke short conversations of politics with diplomats before moving on.

He turned when someone tapped his shoulder about to decline when he saw the orange hair. "May I have this dance?" The man bowed with a smirk.

"You? What are you doing here?" Grimmjow asked, stunned.

"I have said terrible things and I couldn't leave things in tatters like that so I came to apologize."

"With legs?"

"Yeah!" Ichigo grinned. "It took a lot of begging to my dad but he said he would let me go to be happy. And he's giving me more than a week."

"Well, I guess we should work hard and put those legs to go use. We can't let him down, now can we?"

"No," Ichigo smiled brightly as Grimmjow put his hands on his waist to sway with the music, "no, we can't."

"It would be rude," they smirked together.


	3. Battlefield

This is probably the most AU thing I've ever done. This chapter is titled Battlefield derived from a song by the same title by Jordin Sparks. Everything is weird and I think Isshin is the only one who's in character. Enjoy~

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"W-we-ahh-shouldn't be doing-mmn-this."

He captured my lips and I could taste my release on his tongue.

"General..." I whispered, "General...please..."

"Oh? What is this? I never would've thought that Strawberry Prince would resort to begging."

"We fight a battle tomorrow and yet you do these debauched things to me. Do you wish for me to die?"

He slapped my thigh and I shivered as the pleasureful vibrations ran straight to my groin. He chuckled and I attempted to close my legs.

"Not only that, but you're a masochist." He pried my legs open and smirked. "Look at this, you've gone hard again. Just from one spank?"

He smacked me again and a soft moan escaped my lips. "Ichi-berry, would you like me to take care of this little problem you're having?"

I covered my face and nodded. His hands slid up my sides, and he tried to pull my hands from my face. "Let me see your beautiful face."

"No."

"Why?"

"It's embarrassing."

The General chucked. "How is it embarrassing? It's only me, I'm the only one that gets to see your face stained like this."

He kissed me and pushed into me swiftly, his addicting kiss swallowing my moans. He began moving and I gasped breaking the kiss.

"Oh! Oh!" I covered my mouth to muffle my screams but he wasn't having that. He pinned my arms above my head and latched onto my neck.

My body spasmed out of my control and I choked on a moan. "Let me hear it love, I want to hear your voice screaming my name."

"General please..." He thrust in deep and tears flew from my eyes. "God please!"

"Say it, my beautiful prince, scream it out." He grunted, perspiration dripping from his chin.

"Grimmjow!" I shrieked, my orgasm hitting me hard like a combat tank.

He groaned long and loud, his seed filling my belly to the brim. I gasped and he collapsed onto me, his body shaking with his shuddered breaths.

We laid there for a long while, the adrenaline finally settling in my blood. "General..."

His arms tightened around my waist, showing me that he was still awake. "What are we fighting for?"

He was silent for awhile before replying, "our great-grandfathers were fighting over something stupid, dragged their sons into it who dragged their sons and their sons into it and now we're still fighting it for no reason at all."

"You think we can end it?"

"You want to end a 70 year war?"

"I don't want to have to fight anymore, I don't want to have to fight with you anymore, to hide our relationship; it's hard wondering when I'll see you again, if I'll see you again."

He lifted his head from my chest to look at me. His cyan eyes shined with love as he stroked my hair from my face. "Ichi, you have to understand, if it were that simple I would have attempted it when we first started our relationship. It just isn't that simple."

"It has to be!" I replied, "it has to because innocent lives are going to be lost if this fiasco doesn't stop! I want this to stop Grimm, I'm going to get hurt if it doesn't."

"What do you mean?" He asked.

It was now or never. I needed to tell him. "Grimm, I'm-"

"My Prince!" The voices of my men were calling out and I looked at Grimmjow with fear. "My Prince where are you?"

He put on his clothes with lightening speed and I threw on the robe he gave me as a gift. We ran out of my tent and into the forest behind it.

We stopped behind a tree and he held me close, "what is it you needed to tell me?"

"There's no time! They've got guns, if they see you they'll kill you!"

I escaped his hold and rushed to go back to my tent but he grabbed my arm. "Grimmjow! I have to-mng!" He kissed me softly, his lips moving against mine, telling me he loves me, before disappearing into the night.

"My Prince!" The pattering of feet came toward me and I stepped out from behind the trees. The three of my men stopped at the sight of me and I gave them a small smile.

"My Prince! What are you doing? Why are you here?"

"I'm sorry if I worried you all. I just thought I heard something."

"Renji, check around for threats."

"No, no don't leave. I feel faint." I rocked back and forth and was caught before I could topple into the ground.

"Come my prince, we'll take you back to bed. It seems you haven't completely recovered from your illness."

I looked back toward the forest hoping I gave Grimmjow enough time to escape back to his army.

"Attack!"

The battle had begun and I commanded my army as best I could.

I had been asked kindly to take it easy so my army could fight and I would have to stress and possibly make my condition worse.

I was lost in my thoughts until I felt something press against my head, and a soft clicking of a gun. "Move and I'll blow your brains across your pretty silk curtains."

"I'm already one step ahead of you love." I saw him look down at the knife I had pressed against his stolen uniform. "Which way would prefer me go? Would you like to be gutted or castrated?"

He chuckled and stuck the gun back into the uniform as I retracted my hand. "Now just think if that hadn't been me. Your brains would've been splattered across the silk curtains."

"You underestimate my abilities. I'm fast enough but who else has a voice like yours General?" I turned to look at him and smirked.

"You know me so well, my prince. But I could say the same for you."

"How did you get in here anyway. I'm sure my guards didn't just let you in here."

"Your guards are baffoons. If I could sneak past into your private quarters, anyone could."

"Did you kill them?"

"Of course not. I told them I was sent to protect you because the hospital needed more staff. Surely they know who their comrades are."

"Only in uniform. There are thousands of men out there, if the uniform matches their own, they don't shoot. You being smart, took advantage of that."

"How flattering."

I turned and watched the battle take place. But the truth of the matter was weighing heavy in the back of my mind. How was I going to tell him? That something like this was happening. Would he find me disgusting and leave me? I wanted to curl up and cry, this wasn't even supposed to be possible.

Suddenly I was grabbed and pulled down to the ground. Not a few seconds later bullets flew though my tent. I covered my head as wooden shards from my chair exploded around us.

I looked at Grimmjow and he smirked back at me. "That was my favorite chair!" I called.

"That's all you're worried about?"

I laughed and kissed him quickly, "thanks for saving my life!"

"All part of my plan!"

I gave him a confused look and he got up and ran out of my tent. The gunfire stopped and some shouting began. I laid on the grass for a moment before feet came into my view. "My Prince!"

I was pulled to my feet and I clutched my stomach. I suddenly felt very sick. "My Prince, are you quite alright?"

"Yes yes, I'm fine." I brushed away their hands and sighed. "Is everything alright?"

"Yes, everyth-"

"My Prince!"

I walked out of my tent where another of my men ran up to me. "My Prince, we've captured the leader of the opposing army, he wishes to speak with you."

"Take me to him."

I followed the man, realizing that all fighting had ceased. "What has happened?"

"The leader had ordered his army to cease all firing and fighting and placed himself in our custody to speak with you."

There was a circle of men and they seemed to be beating up on the man, on Grimmjow.

"Move!" I called, pushing people out of my way, "I said MOVE!"

Everything stopped then and they parted the way for me. I knelt down to him and lifted his head, and despite him being hurt he still gave me a grin that made my heart flutter.

"What do you wish from me General?" I asked.

"If you end this war, my Prince, I will release my free will to you, and become you ever faithful servant for the rest of my days."

"You say you would give up your position, to serve me? Your land and your freedom, just to be by my side? To end this war?"

"Are you willing my prince?"

I stared at him and stood finally. "Renji, release him from his binds."

"But, Ichigo-sama!"

"Now Renji." I ordered.

Renji did as he was told and Grimmjow stood. "Explain to your army what is happening. Tell them to return home to their families and have someone explain to your father what had happened. You won't be returning home. Return immediately to my side the moment you've finished."

"Yes, My Prince." He did as I asked and I never moved until he returned to my side. We began walking and a wave of dizziness washed over me.

"Are you alright?" Grimmjow's hands were on me and I pushed them off.

"I'm fine, I'm just-fine."

I took another step and stumbled into darkness.

When I woke again, I was laying on my back, sheets and duvets tucked up to my neck. But what I noticed first was the sky was the wrong color blue. I sat up and looked around, I was in my room back in the castle.

I rubbed my hands across the silk sheets of my bed and the satin of my duvet. It felt good.

"Guard!" I called out, my voice raspy.

My door was immediately slammed open and my personal guard came in. "You're awake!"

"Yes yes, I'm awake. How long has it been since we arrived back at the castle?"

"About a day, my prince."

"What has come of my new servant?"

"He is in the presence of the king, for evaluation."

"I see. Please send someone to assist me in getting ready."

"Of course."

Within minutes I had multiple people washing me, grooming me and dressing me and I was on my way to my father.

I was escorted to throne room where Grimmjow and my father were talking casually.

"My darling son! We were just talking about you!" My father ran at me and I gave him a swift kick to the face.

"Nothing bad I hope." I said, stomping his face into the floor.

"Of course not." Grimmjow scoffed.

I turned to Grimmjow and smiled. "You don't seem like a prisoner of war to me."

"You're hardly keeping me imprisoned."

"Father, are you disappointed?" I asked.

"About what my son?" He asked, standing.

"My stopping of the war."

"Oh no, my son. I've been wanting to stop the war for ages. Your grandfather would not allow it so. I just didn't think you would be cruel enough to take anyone prisoner."

"Actually father," I reached over and took Grimmjow's hand into my own, "it was a feint, as to prevent an uproar between sides. I brought Grimmjow here with me so he could live peacefully with me, as my lover and as the father of the child I've been carrying inside of me for the last two months."


	4. Wedding Dress

I don't know what came over me while writing this, I don't know why the idea hit me but I think it turned out beautifully. This chapter is titled Wedding Dress derived from a song of the same title by Taeyang. It's short but perfect.

* * *

I couldn't believe you had audacity to send me an invitation to your wedding but I guess it couldn't be helped. You had no idea did you? I was always there for you, I had never given up on you, I was so in love with you and yet, and yet, you did this despicable thing to me. How could I handle that?

I didn't want to see your tears, I didn't want you to be angry at me so I promised I would come anyway, even if it would tear me apart inside.

You had always looked so happy and I always wished he would fuck up so that I could comfort you, hold you in my arms and promise that I would always be there and that I would never do what he did. But it never happened. It pissed me off so much, the fact that you thought he was everything, that he was the perfect one for you, that it would work out like a fairytale.

I hated how you were always right.

I had debated running him over with my car, killing him when he slept since I had a key to your house, sinking his body in the river if it meant I could have you.

Sounds insane but you've made me this way, I just couldn't get over it. I was too strong to cry and I wasn't going to complain to that emo bastard I call a friend so I started drinking.

You were really worried when you found me half dead in my vomit but yet you took care of me and stayed with me until you felt I wouldn't try to drown myself again. I wish I would've told you then but I couldn't bring myself to ruin what we had.

I was so worried about hurting your feelings and taking back my promises that I kept everything to myself. I knew I would regret helping you pick out the outfit for the first date you two had together but I thought you wouldn't make it this far. It seems I was wrong.

You looked so perfect in your white suit. He asked if you wanted to wear a white dress but you had adamantly refused. I thought it would've looked perfect on you but you smacked me for that of course.

You gave me a tight hug and a kiss to my cheek and I savored it because it would be for the last time. It was almost time so I took my seat in the pew at the very front like you asked. You wanted me to be your best man but I refused, the thought paining my heart. You only nodded in understanding and smiled.

The piano began and everyone turned to watch you walk down the aisle to your happiness. I frowned and glared at your groom who had the brightest smile on his face to see you walking toward him. It was annoying.

I looked away for the rest of the procession, unable to watch you vow your life to him.

"...speak now or forever hold your peace." I heard the minister say but the words I wanted to say died in my throat when I saw your face.

I had never seen such an expression of happiness on your face, I just couldn't take that from you. I couldn't.

You sealed your love with a kiss and I closed my eyes. It was over. There was nothing I could do to have you anymore.

The reception was beautiful but as you mingled with others as a newlywed couple, I walked out when you couldn't see me and took my last look at you. You were so beautiful that day. I just couldn't help it.

I decided to shut the doors to what we had and hoped you would forget about me. It would be for the best, it was the way I wanted.

I wished you all the best, as I always wanted, there was nothing left for me to do for you.

Only for you, Abarai Ichigo.

Grimmjow


	5. Comatose

Talk about OOC. This chapter is titled Comatose derived from a song of the same title by Skillet. I think this one went over well and I had to take out the graphic part in the middle. If you ask I'll show it to you~ Enjoy.

* * *

I woke up, sat up and stared at the floor for a few moments before getting up to shower.

It was the same routine every morning.

I inhaled deeply, enjoying the feeling of taking in a gas that wouldn't get me high with too much. I stepped out the shower and went to brush my teeth and hair before getting dressed.

I decided on a pair of tight black jeans and a deep amethyst and black shirt, complete with a matching oversized jacket to hide the scars.

I cleaned up and left my apartment, ready to go face whatever disaster was going to happen today.

I laughed quietly, watching the smoke flow from my lips. My boyfriend had his arm slung around my shoulders as we sat in the alleyway, smoking weed and shooting dice. I wasn't even close to feeling the buzz of getting high, but I could tell Shiro had shot himself up with something before we met up; he was loopy and his pupils were dilated despite having only a few drags.

"Hey babe, you okay? You been silent awhile." I looked at him and smiled. It was all I could do.

"Yeah, I'm good."

I turned my attention back to my blunt burning between my fingers. I suddenly didn't want it anymore. It made me think back to the time when he'd almost killed me.

I threw it just thinking about it.

"I'm leaving this shit. I'm tired of you and your fucking groupies."

He grabbed my arm and gave me a frightening look. "You're not leaving. I won't let you."

I pulled my arm away and spit at him. "Don't touch me. I'm done."

I walked out of the door and he dragged me back by my hair. I screamed and fought and he fought back. He broke my arm, two of my ribs, multiple bruises, cut me up and raped me that night. He called me a whore and kept me tied up on his bed for a week, having his dirty way with me until I was finally able to get away. He told me that he would kill me if I didn't come back to him the next day. I did what he asked me and he fell into a routine of beating me every week. I haven't attempted to leave him, defy him, or not be without him everyday.

I had cheated on him with the one I love most the day before he beat me, Grimmjow Jeagerjaquez.

As a matter of fact, I thought that a visit would be nice.

That night when I parted from Shiro back to my apartment, I called him.

"Hello?" His voice answered on the other side of the phone.

"I want you." I replied softly. "It's been so long and I want you to hold me."

"I'll be there in a few. Wait for me."

I smiled and hung up the phone. I looked around my apartment and cleaned up quickly, changing the sheets on my bed and straightening the living room. I decided to change into something a little more comfortable.

I stripped down naked and slipped on a long shirt. I went into the small kitchen and looked through my fridge; nothing edible.

I sighed and laid my head against the cold metal of the refrigerator and sighed. I tensed when a body laid itself over mine.

A husky voice fluttered into my ear. "Did you forget I was coming that fast?"

I turned in his embrace and kissed him fiercely. It was always like this when I got low. Sex first, sentimentals later.

"You're better than drugs, you know that?" I panted as he pressed me against the fridge.

"I would hope so," he said as he pushed into me, "I'd be hurt if you liked them better than me."

I clutched his shirt as he rammed into me. It felt so good and he seemed to know just how much I was hurting because I forgot all about it when he released into me.

I moaned softly as I came down from my own high, the sound of his cum dripping out of my ass and onto the floor turned me on all over again.

"Shit." He whispered, kissing me again, "you're bleeding. When's the last time he-"

"Last night."

"Fuck that."

I shook my head and he carried me into my room and to my bathroom. My legs wobbled as he put me down to turn on the shower. I just stood there, not wanting to move so he took off my shirt.

I walked numbly into the shower, his warm body following me into the hot spray.

I leaned back into his embrace and we stood there, peacefully under the water, his arms wrapped around my waist and my arms wrapped around his arms.

"You've lost more weight, you're lighter than I remember. Have you been puking everything you eat still?"

"I haven't been eating." I replied absently.

"So you're telling me that all you've been doing is smoking, sleeping, and getting fucked?"

"Pretty much."

He reached to turn off the water but I stopped him. "Don't." I whispered and made him sit down, impaling myself on him, restricting his movements.

"You're going to come live with me."

"I've already told you-"

"And I don't care. I can't stand it anymore. We're going to pack your stuff as soon as we get out."

"You've just paid my rent and all my bills."

"It was pocket change. I can provide for you if you would let me."

"At the end of the month. When my rent and water and electricity go out. I'll move in with you then, I promise. Until then, I'll stay here. For your generosity."

He kissed me and I smiled. "You're too much."

Grimmjow had explained dramatically that two weeks was far too long and that without me he would suffer from withdrawal. I agreed to go to his house every day for fourteen days and bring one thing with me that I would have when I moved in. He said I wouldn't need the big stuff like a bed or settees or even my TV so I brought small sentiments like pictures and vases.

He fed me everyday and rubbed my stomach so I wouldn't puke. It was working and I was surprised to look at myself in the mirror. My skin wasn't sickly pale, the bones were beginning to gain some fat and the blood was rushing through my body again.

I met up with Shiro every morning like I was meant to, and as soon as he dropped me at my apartment Grimmjow picked me up to take me to his house where I would be stuffed like a turkey, held gently, falling asleep in Grimmjow's arms and waking up back in my apartment each morning, where I would repeat the cycle.

There was a knock at my door so I grabbed the vase I would be taking with me. I opened the door and was surprised to find Shiro at the door.

"Hey babe, what are you doing here?"

"Just stopping by, seeing if you were home. Were you about to go out?"

"I was going to go to the store. But since you're here, come in I guess."

"Going to the store with a vase?"

"I was straightening up. God what's with all the fucking questions?"

"I'm worried about you is all." He reached for me and I backed away.

"For what?"

"Just because."

"That's no reason."

He reached for me and I stepped away again.

"Why are you backing away?"

"Look babe-"

"No you look. Do you see what you're doing?" I discreetly pulled the phone Grimmjow gave me out of my pocket and called him and put I back into my pocket. "You think that if you just lie to me then I'll just go away? Think again bitch. Where have you been going every night for the last twelve days?"

I felt like I could hear Grimm's voice in the back of my head, begging me not to tell him, that I would get hurt if I did.

"I've been going to Grimmjow's house everyday because he's going to help me get a restraining order against your ass. I was going to live with him and I was going to be happy with him, because he can give me everything you can't and more. I've told you once before, I'm done with you and your fucking groupies. I don't love you and I will never."

His hand was suddenly on my neck. "So you want to be a whore? Fine I'll show you what it feels like to be a whore. Let's see if Grimmy will want you after we're done with you."

"What do you mean 'we'?"

He dragged me into my bedroom and threw me on the bed. His hand was on my neck again and suddenly more hands were restraining my limbs.

"Let me go you fuckers! All of you are dead!"

"Dose him up and give him a lot of it. I want to make sure he's brain dead when I'm done with him."

Some came at me with a syringe and I struggled but as soon as I felt the sting in my side I knew everything had been done.

"Help me!" I cried out. "I don't care how you do it! Just get here fast!"

"Nobody's coming to save you. Face it you're alone."

"They've drugged me! So...I'm sorry about whatever you hear..."

-Normal-

Shiro smirked as Ichigo stopped struggling. "Shit, that worked fast."

"All that moving boss. Sent it running through his blood faster."

"Strip him and tie his hands, eagle spread. He won't know his own name when I get done. How much did you give him?"

"Enough without him overdosing."

"Good."

Shiro looked at his naked beauty strapped to the bed. "Someone run and get my toys."

Ichigo looked around, his mind foggy and his vision cloudy. They drugged him up pretty good. But he didn't want to know what they were going to do to him, he just hoped Grimmjow would get him in time.

-No Graphic Part- -No Graphic Part-

I don't know how long I laid there but I was numb. I couldn't tell what hurt and what didn't. Pain shot me every time I moved so I tried to concentrate on breathing but I must have passed out because next thing I knew I was being touched again.

"No! Please I'm sorry for what I did! Just let me go!"

"Ichi! Open your eyes! It's me, it's only me."

I gasped for breath and the voice finally registered in my head.

"Grimm..." I breathed.

The restraints on my wrists were removed but I couldn't move my arms. Grimmjow helped me and laid my arms at my side and unbound me before throwing his trench over me.

"I'm going to get you help."

"And then I can live with you?" I questioned absently, my mind slowly shutting down from exhaustion.

"We'll live together and I'll treat you with a happily ever after."

"Sounds like a plan." I closed my eyes and let my body fall into relaxation.

-Normal-

Grimmjow carried Ichigo out of the building and the paramedics laid him on a stretcher.

Grimmjow jumped into the ambulance and soon they were off to the hospital.

The medics began checking Ichigo, his vitals, and external damage. They took off Grimmjow's trench and he nearly vomited from the words he saw on on the soft skin of his lover.

My whore, was carved into the flesh of his stomach, blood still seeping out of the wound. He roamed his love's arm where slut and bitch had been carved as well.

Ichigo began to spasm, his body flopping away like a fish out of water.

"He's going into shock, stabilize him!" The medics were trying hard to stop the blood flow and stabilize him at the same time and he was pushed out as soon as they reached the hospital. Grimmjow watched them take Ichigo into the hospital and he could only watch, his feet wouldn't, couldn't move to follow.

"Jeagerjaquez-sama, please come. We have a change of clothes for you and a place for you to sit and wait."

He followed them mechanically, his fear for Ichigo growing with each minute.

He changed quickly and was sat in a private room where he waited, and waited and waited. It had to have been hours but a doctor finally came out.

"Jeagerjaquez-sama." He greeted.

"How is he?"

The doctor sighed. "We were able to stabilize him and stop the blood flow but his body went into shock."

Grimmjow was frozen with fear. He always heard of people dying of shock. "Is he dead?"

"No! No, he's only slipped into a coma. There's no telling when he'll wake up."

"Can I see him?"

"Of course, follow me."

Grimmjow followed the doctor across the hospital and into a private room where his beloved laid quietly, the bruises on his face extremely accented with the paleness of his skin.

The doctor left, leaving him time to sit with his comatose lover.

"Jeagerjaquez-sama."

It had been eight months since the incident and the nurses had become accustom to asking the man if he needed anything, or if he wanted this or that, or anything else at specific times during the day and he had their normal routine down to the second.

"No thanks," he said before any question could be uttered.

A spike on the monitor threw off the schedule and he quickly moved out of the way so the nurses could help his lover.

This had happened multiple times before, but this time seemed to be different. "His heart is failing! Get a doctor in here stat!"

Grimmjow was shooed out of the room and he leaned against the opposite wall as he watched doctors and nurses rush into the room. It was a long 30 minutes, but a doctor finally came out and smiled.

"He's awake, Jeagerjaquez-sama."

Grimmjow kept his nerves calm as he walked back into the room. He saw Ichigo sitting up and staring at the blanket in front of him.

"Ichi..." Grimmjow whispered, grasping his hand tightly.

"Are you Grimmjow?" The comment surprised Grimmjow but he nodded either way. "I don't know who you are but I know your name. Isn't that weird?"


	6. A Twist in My Story

Honestly, I feel like the content of the story has nothing to do with the song but then I think it does. Strange.. This chapter is titled A Twist in My Story derived from a song of the same title by Secondhand Serenade. Enjoy~

* * *

All was quiet in the night, the moonlight giving a resemblance of melancholy rays of silence. But as the silence scene was just so, not everything in world was silent there.

The sound of slapping skin and the desperation of muffled moans was enough to make the outside look like a sunlit day.

The atmosphere in that room was that of vengeance, tension, resignation, and relief. This kind of sex required no words, it required no sound, and it was about control. The kind of control that spoke of possession and jealousy, as well as the kind that put the beta in their place. Their movements spoke of apologies and forgiveness but also anger and trepidation. They were afraid but they knew there was nothing else for them but each other.

Their relationship had been shredded, glued back together before shattering and yet they couldn't stay away from one another. When their eyes met after their last break up, they had to reunite themselves, connect themselves in such a way because that was the only way for them to understand they were meant for each other. Their bodies fit together like puzzle pieces, the touches of sensitive places and knowledge of every pleasure point was something they couldn't forget.

The alpha bared his teeth, his blue eyes staring down at the defiant yet pleading ones of his orange haired beta. His hand covered swollen pink lips, the other holding a leg over his shoulder as his hips demonstrated exactly who was boss. Another thrust in the right direction had the beta crying out behind the hand holding his face. Tears slid from his eyes and he looked back to his alpha. He was powerful and sexy as the moonlight washed over his sweat slicked body, soft pants and grunts escaping his lips from pleasure and exertion.

The hand lifted from his mouth to wipe away his tears and as he opened his mouth to speak, a loud ringing destroyed the sexual silence. He glanced to his alpha and the blunet jerked his head in permission.

"H-hello?" His voice was thick as he tried to keep it under control but his alpha hadn't stopped his intoxicating motions.

"Where are you?" A voice on the other side questioned. The beta closed his eyes as his hazy mind tried to come up with an answer.

"I can't-" He responded, his voice cut by a gasp ripping from his own throat. He was enjoying the feeling, his masochistic side reacting as he was being listened to.

His alpha seemed to read his thoughts as a smirk spread across his face and he moved to give his beta pleasure.

"Are you alright?" He snapped back into reality as the voice on the phone came back in his ears.

"We can't do this," he panted, amazed he was able to produce a coherent sentence, "I can't, not anymore."

A silence spread on the other end before a reply was given. "Are you with him?"

"Yes." The call was ended then, his alpha taking the phone and turning off the volume before throwing it somewhere.

He had broken the silence. He had lost and yet he wasn't disappointed. It wasn't the first time, just like it wasn't the first time he'd gone without pleasure. His alpha gave him pleasure when he wanted and didn't give it to him when he didn't deserve it. That's how it was.

He reached up and wrapped his arms around his alpha's neck, bringing their faces close and their lips closer but not moving beyond that. The new position gave him a round of pleasure that had him shutting his eyes. Lips pressed to his own, the feral kiss domineering and rough but pleasureful in a certain aspect.

His alpha soon released, the tension in his body leaving with it. He wasn't angry anymore, his punishment had been fulfilled. They laid down, their bodies pulled together before he was brought to his own release. Fatigued, his curled to his alpha's side and nearly purred at the fingers running through his hair.

"You're mine, you know that?" His alpha whispered, breaking the silence once again.

The beta looked up, moonlight reflecting from chocolate orbs beautifully before a mischievous smile pursed his lips. "I know."

They fell asleep that way, both decided they would conform to each other before splitting and repeating the cycle.

It was never about the control, it was never about the punishment, it was about the masochist and the sadist who challenged to be silent during brutal sex and how many people they could drive to suicide.


	7. Only One

This chapter is titled Only One derived from a song of the same title by Yellowcard. I want to thank Kazugami Saichi Hakuraichi for this song idea. It was really fun to write. I hope you like it.

* * *

When had things become this way? They both thought it but only wondered instead of questioning.

Alcohol impaired judgement as well as aim which was good for the both of them at the moment since stationary things found themselves in the air on both sides. One remained in the broken house, drowning his sorrows in tears and a bottle of whiskey while the other drunk back shot after shot with the only friend he trusted to reveal his shitty relationship as well as take him home safely when he was too drunk to stand on his own two feet.

Although the process of getting the drunk home was safe, being in that house was not. Not when they were both that way.

"I hate you! Leave! Get out!" A vase, a book, and a pen were thrown with each phrase although they never reached their target.

Bloodshot cyan eyes rolled and he chucked the book back at the orangette, smacking him in the leg. "Yer drunk. Go to bed."

"Fuck you!" Ichigo snarled and rubbed the place where a bruise would possibly form. "You're more drunk than I am!"

"Probably." Grimmjow shrugged. As opposed to the orangette standing across from him, he was on his ass not trusting himself to stand without either passing out or throwing up.

"Get the hell out." Ichigo yelled searching for something else to throw. Grimmjow sighed wondering why his lover was such a violent drunk.

"Hey Ichi," Grimmjow leaned his head on the wall he was against.

"What?" The other responded with annoyance.

"Why are we still together?"

The question threw Ichigo off, and he paused. "I don't know."

"We shouldn't be together. If I piss you off so much then we should split." Grimmjow said softly. "Yer sexy when yer angry but I've been screwing up huh?"

Ichigo didn't respond and leaned against the counter. "What are you saying?"

"You need to find someone else. Someone who won't be such a dick to you, someone who is doing better than me, someone who will treat you better, someone who isn't me."

Ichigo looked at Grimmjow then, his eyes wide and his breath coming in short gasps. Grimmjow wanted them to break up?

"But don't go for anyone who's ugly. If you downgrade I'll be pissed."

Ichigo crossed the room swiftly for being drunk and punched Grimmjow hard in the jaw. The blunet froze in surprise and looked at the orangette who stared at his trembling fist.

"I can't believe you." Ichigo got to his knees and sat in front of Grimmjow his body trembling. "I can't believe you would say such and insensitive thing. As if I didn't love you anymore."

"Isn't that how it is? You always tell me you hate me and that I should leave. What else am I supposed to think?"

"You should think to ask what I'm talking about and why. You're so insensitive and sometimes I want you to leave because you don't care and you never pay attention!"

"I always pay attention!" Grimmjow shouted. "You think I don't know anything that goes on with you? The changes in your routine, your sluggish movements and constant days out, or how pale you've been. There's even those bottles of pills you thought you kept hidden. What is your problem?"

Ichigo flinched and the air in the room became cold.

"Grimm...I'm dying..."

Every ounce of alcohol seemed to disappear from Grimmjow's body when those words were uttered. "What?"

"I have cancer. I haven't been able to see a doctor who can fix me. My dad has only been able to give me medicine to take away the pain but it's eating at me Grimm. I wanted us to be together always. I didn't want to push you away."

Grimmjow reached forward and pulled the orangette close. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I wanted you to leave me. I wanted you to be so fed up with me that you would leave. I would feel terrible knowing I died while you still loved me." Ichigo laughed softly, his eyes heavy, "but you're so persistent."

"You're an idiot." Grimmjow shook his head. "Is there anyone who can help you?"

"In America, there's someone but I can't. There's no way to cover the medical bills."

"You let me handle that."

"But Grimmjow-"

"No more Ichigo. No more."

They became silent, their fight of drunken anger over.

"Can I ask why?"

Grimmjow pondered the proper words to give before kissing his hair. "I want you here with me. You're my only one."

-Three Months Later-

Grimmjow waited at the airport standing at the baggage claim patiently. He watched the people filter out from the flight that came from Los Angeles, California and smiled when he saw the short tufts of orange hair. It was as if they hadn't spoken with each other the night before and felt like they hadn't seen each other in years. Ichigo jumped for his lover, the blunet catching him effortlessly. The shared a breathtaking kiss but closed it down quickly aware that they were still in public.

"How do you feel?" Grimmjow asked, stroking the shortened orange locks.

"Great honestly, it feels so good to be back in Japan, to be back in your arms." Ichigo smiled wide as they got his bags.

"Come on, I have a surprise for you."

Grimmjow led Ichigo out to a bright red parked car and put his bags in the trunk. He ushered Ichigo into the car and got into the driver's seat.

"You got a new car?" Ichigo asked in surprise.

"Shh," Grimmjow smirked and pulled off, "it's part of the surprise."

They remained quiet the entire ride, Ichigo wondering what Grimmjow could possibly be planning. His anxiety shifted when they pulled into the long driveway of a large house, no, mansion.

Grimmjow parked the car and pulled Ichigo's bags from the trunk. Ichigo frowned and followed Grimmjow up the front stairs where the doors opened immediately.

"Welcome home, Ichigo!"

Ichigo was shocked silent, a large banner reading 'Welcome Home, Ichigo' was neatly hung across the large genkan and all his friends and family, as well as Grimmjow's were standing and smiling. He turned to the blunet who was watching him with amusement.

"What is this?"

Grimmjow chuckled, "all these people decided they wanted to throw you a surprise party and that's all you say? And you call me insensitive."

Ichigo turned back to the crowd before entering the house and giving a huge smile. "I'm home everyone!"

The party and festivities went on deep into the night but Ichigo claimed fatigue and Grimmjow escorted him to a large room almost as big as their last apartment.

Ichigo sat on the bed and Grimmjow knelt on the floor in front of him and took Ichigo's hands in his own.

"So," Grimmjow began, "I'm sure you have questions."

"The house?"

"My old man's old man died a little after you left and suddenly I had billions to my name as well as an international company to run. He left this estate as well as other properties to me and you know, rich people stuff. I thought I was going to tell you as soon as I found out but I wanted to leave you a surprise somewhere."

"The car?"

"A present from me to you."

Ichigo swallowed his retort knowing Grimmjow wouldn't let him say no. "You?"

"It's been so hard without you here but now that you are here the void in my heart is filled again. This might be cheesy but I got this before my inheritance with money I saved up just for it. Things like this don't really have any value if there's no true meaning and feeling so I'll say it like this."

Grimmjow pulled a black box from behind his back and placed it in Ichigo's hands.

"The way we are now, with me on my knees looking up at you is how it will be. I want to be your stepping stool, your support, the one who takes everything for you. I may be the king," Ichigo laughed thickly at Grimmjow's narcissism, "but you are my god. Be my sunshine and be my light on the darkest days, be my one and only."

He opened the black box and inside was a band made of white gold and diamonds. "Whaddya say, Ichi-berry?"

Ichigo smiled and kissed the blunet. "I say yes."

-Owari-


	8. Alone

This chapter is titled Alone derived from a song of the same title by Heart. I've had it written for awhile and I have no idea why I'm posting it after such a long time. I hope you enjoy it either way.

* * *

I laid facing the wall in our large bedroom, the clock ticking away, my life wasting away. It had been three hours since I decided to lay down and try to sleep but, of course, I can never sleep when he's not here. The curtains were drawn and I laid in the dark, a few streams of light shining through. I held his pillow closer to my body, my cell phone in hand, no calls, emails, there was no indication that he was even still alive and that I thought that way scared me.

I got up and decided to take a walk around the house, maybe it would take my mind off of things. I grabbed my phone and left the confines of the room. Everything was silent in the house; I decided to send the maids home for the day so that I could be alone, so that I could bask in my sadness, to hope and pray that he would come home soon. I sat in the hallway against the wall in the west wing of the manor, the hunger settling in my mind and the trepidation of being alone making tears come to my eyes. I moved along and opened the door to the glass corridor of the manor. I sat in the silent corridor, the intimidating emptiness toying with the edges of my insanity, the eerie silence outside where no birds chirped, the butterflies didn't flap their pretty wings, the grasshoppers didn't even sing their songs to me. I stared out of glass corridor, doors on either side of me and nothing but glass panels that made up this tunnel. It was the closest I could get to outside.

Maybe I have been kept hidden for my own good, maybe it is to protect me, but this is unhealthy, I suffocate in this too big house, maybe it's—

"Because I love you? Because I want to keep you safe? Because I never want you to be taken from me again?"

I looked up slowly and he stood leaning up against the door, arms crossed, his eyes glowing more than mine. "You don't keep your thoughts hidden very well. Did you miss me?"

I nodded, my body numb with relief. I licked my lips. He was home.

* * *

Here I was again, laying in our bed facing the wall, alone, but this time I knew he was in the bathroom taking a shower. He asked me to join but I declined so that I could lay down and here I was singing the lyrics to this sad song in my head. I could hear the shower cut off and I closed my eyes and feigned sleep as he opened the door. I felt him sit on the bed and begin stroking my hair, rubbing my face, tracing my lips, and he pulled me close as he laid down and even as I felt him relax into sleep I still couldn't find comfort.

When I woke, the curtains were open and the moonlight filtered in. I looked around in fear but instantly relaxed when I smelled him nearby. I got up and walked into the bathroom, the cold tile feeling colder than it seemed.

I turned on the shower and jumped in as the water was already hot. I stood under the scalding spray, my skin turning red steadily as it ran through my hair, down my neck, over my shoulders, across my torso, and cascaded down my legs into the drain. I closed my eyes and sighed, the tense muscles never relaxing. I sighed once more and then his presence suddenly appeared behind me as his arms wrapped around my waist.

"Are you alright?" He whispered in my ear softly. I shivered and nod.

"It's warmer since you're with me again." I muttered turning in his embrace. "When will you have to leave me again."

"Don't sound like that." He said huskily. "You know it's only to protect you."

"I don't feel safe when you're not with me. I never feel safe anymore."

"That's why I have maids here, but you keep sending them home."

"I feel even more unsafe when they're here. You leave me for weeks on end and it's killing me. It's destroying me on the inside."

"I have no choice. If I ever want you to be safe I need you to stay in this house, you need to stay with me, you need to stay safe."

"Grimmjow..." I breathed out, my skin prickling despite the hot water,"I need you." I pressed in closer to him, my throat dry with thirst. "I need you."

He tilted his head and I swallowed, "take all you need Berry-chan. I'm here for you and only you."

I put my hands on his shoulders for leverage, and sunk my fangs into the junction between his shoulder and his neck. The blood flowed into my mouth and it felt like the life was coming back to me. I didn't drink a lot for my constant fear of hurting my lover and when I pulled away and went to lick his wound to heal it, he stopped me.

"Ichigo, you torture me when you do this." My eyes never left the bleeding wound, "you torture yourself when you do this."

"Grimm, you're bleeding..." I leaned forward to lick at it and this time he didn't stop me. As soon as the sweet liquid hit my tongue, I couldn't help myself, I had to take more. I lapped at the blood around his neck and healed the wound but I never pierced his flesh again.

He chuckled and reached past me to turn off the tap. "You're so selfless." He grabbed a towel from the rack outside of the shower and wrapped it around me as if I were a small child.

"I'm not a child Grimmjow." He kissed my nose and I glared.

"You are a child, and until you can prove it otherwise to me then I will continue to think of you that way." He lifted me up and carried me back into our bedroom.

He dumped me on the bed and I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him.

"I love you, so much."

He smiled, his cyan orbs gleaming in the moonlight. "I love you more."

"I love you most."

"When will you be back?" I asked softly. I was trying not to cry but with each passing moment it was becoming harder.

"By the Blood Moon." He kissed me and I couldn't hold the tears anymore. He smiled and wiped away my tears. "You know I hate leaving you like this. I want you to be strong, and when we I come back, I'll be here all the time. Everything will be fine."

"I can wait two weeks for forever."

"That's right. But until then, you cannot go outside. You understand, don't you?"

"I understand."

"I'll always be here," he placed his hand over my heart and I smiled.

"And in my dreams every night."

"I'll see you tonight, in your dreams."

I nodded solemnly and he kissed me one last time before departing. The maids closed the front door and approached me.

"Come Kurosaki-sama, we have prepared a relaxing lavender bath and chocolate for you."

They led me along without touching me and I had a moment of guilt. When Grimmjow came back there would be no denying what would happen come the near future.

But until then, I would accept the lavender bath and chocolate with the hopes of relaxing.


	9. Soundless Voice

This chapter is titled Soundless Voice derived from a song of the same title by Valshe. I'm not usually one to promote but it is a really beautiful song and I wouldn't mind suggesting that you go listen to it. It may be very enjoyable.

* * *

The surrounding world was quiet, silent even, eerily silent beside shuddered breaths and chattering teeth. There had been a moment of serenity and humour before this disaster occurred but they figured they would make the best of it until help came.

"Come on, you can't go silent on me now."

Ichigo nodded and moved closer to Grimmjow as they decided what to do now.

A part of him wanted to go off on a tirade about how stupid his lover was for even suggesting they take a hike up a snow covered mountain during their vacation, how idiotic he was for wandering into a cave and then getting them both stuck in said cave after a sudden avalanche trapped them with too much snow and ice to claw through. He sighed and shook his head. He could also go on a tirade to himself about how stupid he was for following his lover up the mountain even though he wasn't the best climber, how stupidly loving he was to have followed his lover into the cave and ended up having to save his lover from getting crushed and impaled by snow and ice from the avalanche and icicles from the ceiling of the cavern during the aftermath. Lucky for him, sarcastically, Grimmjow managed to break his ankle and now his foot was awkwardly angled and looked painful. The blunet simply shrugged and said he couldn't feel anything but didn't allow Ichigo to touch it or try to set it back in place. There was no way they could move if they wanted to and Ichigo wasn't going to leave to try to find a way out lest he get stuck somewhere and then they'd both be dead.

"If we die here," Grimmjow started and Ichigo looked up at him, "I'm glad I'll die here together with you."

"Idiot," Ichigo muttered. "You get all out of character when you're close to death. We're not going to die. I'm sure Nel got my message."

He thought back to when they first got trapped, he tried to call his boyfriend's sister and she answered thankfully but the signal was so bad they couldn't hear each other. He resigned himself to sending her a text and thanked all heavens it sent through before his signal completely disappeared.

Then he thought beyond that to when they had first almost experienced death together. They had been on their way back home from a birthday party and their car had been t-boned and went flying into a ditch. They were sure the other guy was dead or unconscious because there had been no movement. The car had hit on Grimmjow's side and the blunet was badly injured but was saying crazy, un-Grimmjow like things about how much he loved Ichigo and how he was glad his side was the side that was hit. It scared Ichigo and the fact that their car was upturned and a puddle of blood was forming under Grimmjow he couldn't handle it.

Luckily, help came rather quickly and they were saved, Grimmjow taken immediately to the hospital with critical injuries. Ichigo felt so grateful that it was because of the way Grimmjow protected him that he wasn't hurt anymore than he was.

Ichigo cuddled closer and Grimmjow held him close. They were going to have to talk because it would too dangerous for them to fall asleep but it was useless since his eyes were slowly dropping. He wasn't just so tired but all his energy seemed to be dropping quickly. Grimmjow was shaking him and telling him not to go to sleep but he couldn't help it. It was too tempting.

"higo-! Ichigo!" His eyes opened slightly, bright light and blurriness filled his vision. His head pounded and he groaned before consciousness fled from him.

When he woke again, and was immediately attacked by doctors, policemen, and therapists, he asked what exactly was going on. No one answered his questions and when he asked about Grimmjow, looks of misery and pity filled their faces.

"Where is Grimmjow?" He asked again.

"I'm sorry, but-"

"Let me tell him."

Ichigo looked at the hospital room door and took in the tearstained face of Nel and his heart jumped. Everyone was shooed from the room and she took his hand as she sat next to him.

"Where is Grimm? Nel, you can tell me."

She sniffed as her tears started again. "We had finally found where you had been trapped but it was too long to get through the avalanche. By the time we got to you, you were unconscious and Grimmjow was laying over you probably to keep you warm. The doctors said he just went to sleep and didn't wake up and the pain he would have felt was the pain from his ankle. They said that because he laid over you after you passed out is probably the only thing that saved your life."

Ichigo felt the world freezing and crashing around him. "Then he's-"

Nel nodded somberly. "He's gone. Severe hypothermia, shock, frostbite and dehydration."

Ichigo nodded numbly, his breath caught in his throat. Grimmjow was gone. He was gone and there was no bringing him back.

That was a month ago.

Ichigo settled on his knees in the snow, a small slab of stone with him and he pulled things out of his bag. He was in front of the cave and he thrust the tombstone into the snow covered ground and lit incense before putting his hands together.

"Honestly Grimm," he frowned against his hands, "I say something and you just love to prove me wrong all the time. I said we weren't going to die in there and you go and die. You're annoying the that trait of yours."

He continued with his rant and wouldn't have cared if the mountain decided to come down on him again.

"I didn't save your life for you to die on me, literally..."

He stood up after awhile, and walked into the cave staring at the place they had been. The imprint of their bodies was still there and he went over to reminisce.

He noticed the writing on the ground first.

_It's been great so protect my berry. He's my everything so he has to get through this even if I don't._

_No matter what, protect my Ichi._

It was reflex that his hand came to his mouth and his eyes filled with tears again. The writing was shaky and Grimmjow must have been on the edge when he wrote it. He didn't care. All he was glad about was that he had the last words of his love with him and he would treasure them forever.

Even if he couldn't hear Grimmjow's voice anymore and the snow was the only witness to this, he wished that the white world would granted him one last wish to turn back time.

As he stood in the entrance of the cave, his breath clouding the air in front of him as he stared to the gray sky, he knew that if the mountain fell down on him now, he wouldn't move.

He would come back again and until the time that it happened, he would move forward if only to heed the last words Grimmjow left for him.

_Don't let your world, turn to white..._


	10. Sand Castle

This chapter is titled Sand Castle derived from a song of the same title in Japanese by Wakeshima Kanon. I found the sudden inspiration for this randomly and I think I like the length. I purposely mentioned a phrase four times because of a Japanese superstition involving the number four. It was very wrong of me but as this story has to do with death anyway, it seemed appropriate. I apologize if I offend you.

* * *

I laid on that beach full of coldness and desolation, the quiet swish of the ocean caressing the sand and pulling it back. It seemed like that's what death was doing to you. Caressing you softly and enticing you to follow before pulling away and leaving you broken only to recover slightly and repeat the cycle. You were moving closer and closer to death's edge but he couldn't take you all at once, no, your strength wouldn't allow that. He pulled you in closer and closer and weakened you to this point, to the point of no return.

I laid on that beach full of coldness and desolation. The sky was dark and the frustration began to kill me inside. You couldn't be saved and so you suffered next to me, in my arms, inside, everywhere. You said it was okay but your eyes showed your pain, your face showed death, your body showed your agony, the agony of the relief that would never come, the salvation the would never grace you until you were dead. How had it come to this?

You called my name. The nickname you had given me when you said I was pouting supposedly, the nickname you gave me after I sulked after a fight, the nickname I allowed because you had come up with it.

"Grimmy," you reached for me and I held your hand to appease you, to try and take some of your pain but you smiled at me and I knew it hadn't worked. Your eyes weren't smiling, your pale, sunken face gave me no indication of change but the raise of your lips had me smiling back at you because there was nothing else I could do. "Grimmy, let's build a sand castle."

I nodded to you and you watched with dimmed eyes as I built up a mound of sand and dug a little tunnel through it. You reached out and patted down a side and smiled again.

"Grimmy, what a beautiful sand castle. Let's live in it together so you don't have to be sad anymore."

I couldn't bring myself to utter out a word.

I laid on that beach full of coldness and desolation and as you laid there beside me, I knew that the edge you had gone over was someplace I couldn't reach just by laying there.

I laid on that beach full of coldness and desolation, I knew that you weren't there anymore. Just being beside me, and you were never really there, you had left me a long time ago and that was cruel of you.


End file.
